What The Car You Buy Says About You: - Acura Integra

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What the car you buy says about you:
- Acura Integra: I have always wanted to own the Buick of sports cars
- Acura Legend: I'm too bland for German cars
- Acura NSX: I am impotent
- Audi 90: I enjoy putting out engine fires
- Buick Park Avenue: I am older than 34 or the 50 states
- Cadiallac ElDorado: I am a very good Mary Kay salesman
- Cadiallac Seville: I am a pimp
- Chevrolet Camaro: I enjoy beating the hell out of people
- Chevrolet Chevette: I like seeing people's reactions when I tell them it's
a 'vette
- Chevrolet Corvette: I'm in a mid-life crisis
- Chevrolet El Camino: I am leading a militia to overthrow the government
- Chrysler Corboda: I dig rich Corinthian leather
- Datsun 280Z: I have a kilo of cocaine in my wheel well
- Dodge Dart: I teach third grade special education and I voted for
Eisenhower
- Dodge Daytona: I delivered pizza for four years to get this car
- Eagle Talon (a.k.a.) 5.0L killer: I enjoy beating the crap out of sports
car wannabees
- Ferrari Testarossa: I am known to prematurely ejaculate
- Ford Fairmont: (see dodge dart)
- Ford Mustang: I slow down to 85 in school zones
- Ford Probe: The name Ford Enema was rejected by marketing department, so
they chose probe. The name says it all: Pain in the butt
- Ford Crown Victoria: I enjoy having people slow down to 55 and change
lanes when I pull up behind them
- Geo Storm: I will start 11th grade in the fall
- Geo Tracker: I will start 12th grade in the fall
- Honda del Sol: I have always said half a convertible is better than no
convertible at all
- Honda Civic: I have just graduated and have no credit
- Honda Accord: I lack any originality and am basically a lemming
- Honda Prelude: When i get my penis enlarged, I will get a real sports car
too
- Infiniti Q45: I am a physician with 17 malpractice suits pending
- Isuzu Impulse: I do not give a damn about J.D. Power or his reports
- Jaguar XJ6: I am so rich, I will pay 60K for a car that is in the shop 280
days per year
- Kia Sephia: I learned nothing from the failure of Daihatsu
- Lamborghini Countach: I only have one testicle
- Lincoln Town Car: I live for bingo and covered dish suppers
- Mercury Grand Marquis: (see above)
- Mercedes 500SL: I will beat you up if you ask me for an autograph
- Mercedes 500SEL: I have a daughter named Bitsy and a son named Cole
- Mazda Miata: I do not fear being decapitated by an 18-wheeler
- MGB: I am dating a mechanic
- Mitsubishi Diamante: I don't know what it means either
- Mitsubishi Eclipse: (see Eagle talon)
- Nissan 300ZX: I have yet to complete my divorce proceedings
- Oldsmobile Cutlass: I just stole this car and I'm going to make a fortune
off the parts
- Peugot 505 diesel: I am on the EPA's ten most wanted list
- Plymouth Neon: I am emotionally unstable, but i am seeing a professional
so I should be o.k., right??? right?? right?? answer me damnit!!!!
- Pontiac Trans AM: I have a switchblade in my sock
- Pontiac Sunfire: "BUILT FOR DRIVERS" who dont know jack Sh*t about cars
and mostly happen to be women fresh out of college who just wanna commute
from A---B
- Porsche 911 turbo: I have a three inch thingie
- Porsche 944: I am dating a big haired woman that otherwise would be
inaccessible to me
- Rolls Royce Silver Shadow: I think Pat Buchannon is a tad bit too liberal
- Saturn SC2: (see honda civic)
- Subaru Legacy: I have always wanted a Japanese car even more inferior than
Isuzu
- Toyota Camry- I am still in the closet
- Toyota Celica: Don't hate me because I am beautiful
- Toyota Supra: Don't judge me because i am beautiful
- Volkswagen Beetle: I still watch Partridge Family reruns
- Volkswagen Cabriolet: I am out of the closet
- Volkswagen Microbus: I am tripping right now
- Volkswagen Corrado: I also like the TV series "The pretender"
- Volvo (any type): I get beaten up by my wife

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