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• Not so famous quotes Ah yes, divorce, from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet.
  --Robin Williams Women complain about premenstrual syndrome, but I think of it as the only time of the month that I can be myself....
• One good way to pay disgruntled postal workers but delay the financial crunch on the Postal Service indefinitely would be to mail their checks.
  }i <<<<***>>>> The latest Gallup poll shows Mr....
• YOU MIGHT BE AN ENGINEER IF... A team of you and your co-workers have set out to modify the antenna on the radio in your work area for better reception All your sentences begin with "what if" At Christma
  it goes without saying that you will be the one to find the burnt-out bulb in the string Buying flowers for your girlfriend or spending the money to upgrade your RAM is a moral dilemma Dilbert is your hero Everyone else on the Alaskan cruise is on deck peering at the scenery, and you are still on a personal tour of the engine room In college you thought Spring Break was a metal fatigue failure On vacation, you are reading a computer manual and turning the pages faster than someone else who is reading a John Grisham novel People groan at the party when you pick out the music The blinking 12...
• GOING POSTAL You've heard the recently coined slang phrase "Going Postal".
  Here are some more examples, from the book "Jargon Watch", just published by Wired magazine....
• Fresh Every 2.7 Days PEE YU PLATTER Clothes Pins Extra HOO FLUNG POO Napkins & Raincoats Provided SUC SUM TIT Children's Special YUNG POON TANG No Take Out Orders Accepted LUNCHEON SPECIALS SUM YUNG CHICK.
  .........$6.99 Different and Delicious WON HUNG LO....
• Some Reasons It's Great To Be a Guy: Phone conversations last 30 seconds You know useful stuff about tanks and airplanes A 5 day vacation requires only one suitcase Bathroom lines are 80% shorter You can open all your own jars Old friends don't give you crap if you've lost or gained weight When clicking through the channels you don't have to stop on every shot of someone crying You don't have to lug a bag of "necessary" items with you everywhere you go You can go to the bathroom alone Your last name stays put You can leave a hotel room bed unmade You can kill your own food The garage is all yours You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness You see the humor in "Terms of Endearment" You never have to clean the toile You can be showered and ready in 10 minutes Wedding plans take care of themselves If someone forgets to invite you to something
  hey can still be your friend Your underwear costs $...
• 100 reasons it's great to be a guy: 1. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
  2. Movie nudity is virtually always female. 3. You know stuff about tanks....
• THE CIVIL SERVANT'S DOG ----------------------- Four workers were discussing how smart their dogs were.
  The first was an engineer who said his dog could draw....