Wrestling
Now that former pro wrestler Jesse "The Body" Ventura has become Governor of
Minnesota, the question of the day is: what if pro wrestlers took control of
the federal government?
** Congressional filibusters take place in "Texas Death" steel cage.
** During House debate, it is customary to yield to the gentleman wielding a
folding chair.
** State of the Union addresses are screamed, 18 inches away from the
camera.
** Past House Speakers: "This session will come to order." New House
Speaker: "Get ready to R-R-R-R-R-RRUMBLE!!!"
** Supreme Court replaces traditional judiciary robes with referee uniforms.
** January 20: Inauguration Day....January 21: FDA OK's over-the-counter
sale of steroids.
** Sex scandals now involve even skankier women.
** Line to body slam Ken Starr winds around Lincoln Memorial.
IN WAKE OF JONES DISMISSAL, A NEW FOCUS FOR STARR
WASHINGTON April 1 (Associated Press)--In the wake of the dismissal of the
Paula Jones sexual-harassment lawsuit, Independent Counsel Kenneth Starr is
focusing his investigation on allegations that President Clinton and members
of the White House staff regularly drink red wine with fish, according to
sources close to the investigation....
W H Y C O P S H A T E Y O U <<<<&l <
-if you have to ask get out of the way-
Have you ever been stopped by a traffic cop and, while he was
writing a ticket or giving you a warning, you got the feeling that
he would just love to yank you out of the car, right through the
window, and smash your face into the front fender?...