Related:

• ahhhhhhhhh...hhhhhhhhhhhhh (heavy breathing sounds, like an obcene phone call) Oh, shit, you called me!
  Sorry, leave your name and number at the beep....
• The Canonical List of Telephone Answering Machine Messages "Hi!
  I don't exist at the moment, but if you leave your message, name and number, I'll call you back when I am....
• One voice: I didn't expect an answering machine. Another voice
  Nobody expects an answrering machine. Our chief use is to get your name....
• My wife and I can't come to the phone right now, but if you'll leave your name and number we'll get back to you as soon as we're finished.
• Loud heavy-metal music in background; raspy voice:) Hello, this is the executioner.
  Joe can't come to the phone right now because he's DEAD!...
• Hello, this is Dr. Pangloss. If this were the best of all possible worlds, I could come to the phone right now, but I can't, so if you could leave your name and number.
  .....
• Tale Of The Sandwich Trailer Here's the background
  Bill works in a coffee, bagels, and sandwiches trailer on the campus of CSUC, Chuck is his boss and the owner of the truck, and yes, according to Bill, this actually happened....
• imitating Mr. Rogers] "Hello. I'm in the Magic Kingdom right now, so I can't come to the phone.
  Can you leave your name and number when you hear the sound of the tone?...
• Theme from "Indiana Jones" in the background.] You've reached the residence of John and Tom.
  We can't come to the phone right now, because we're cleaning the refrigerator....