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• That wish definitely came true," said the bartender admiring the gentleman's blond companion.
  What was your third wish?...
• Rub the lamp A recently divorced woman is walking along the beach contemplating how badly screwed she got over the divorce settlement, when she spies a magic lamp washing up onshore.
  She rubs the lamp, and out pops a magical genie!...
• The gentleman replied, "You're not going to believe my story.
• Husband Quotes: I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was Always.
  I haven't spoken to my wife for 18 months. I don't like to interrupt her....
• At the cocktail party, one woman said to another, "Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on thewrong finger?
  The other replied, "Yes, I am, I married the wrong man....
• Two neighbors were discussing gardening one afternoon.
  The lady from next door remarked, "My but you have such a nice blush on your tomatoes, how do you do it?...
• Cost-cutting Adam Adam was walking around the Garden of Eden, feeling very lonely, so God asked Adam, "What is wrong with you?
  Adam said he didn't have anyone to talk to. God said he was going to give him a companion and it would be a woman....
• The weather is here. I wish you were beautiful!
• Let's say you were trapped inside this room. Inside this room were 2 doors, and 2 caged talking - tigers.
  One of the doors was an exit into the paradise. The other was an exit into a bottomless pit- (In other words, if you opened this door, you'd fall until your insides get ripped apart by the G-forces- actually you'd still fall- Anyway....