One day Miss Smith told her class, "Today we're going to use the word
'definitely' in a sentence. Nancy?" Nancy said, "The sky is definitely
blue." Miss Smith corrected her, "No - sometimes it's overcast and the sky
is gray. And at night the sky is black. The sky isn't definitely blue.
Lenny?" Lenny said, "Ummm ... the grass is definitely green." Miss Smith
corrected Lenny also, "No - sometimes the grass is dead and brown. The
grass isn't definitely green." So Dirty Ernie jumped up and asked, "When
you fart does it ever have lumps in it?" Miss Smith, taken somewhat aback,
stuttered, "Heavens, no!" So Ernie replied, "Then I definitely shit my
pants!"
