Related:

• Borrow from Peter to Pay Paul. Paul will love you foreve
• I thought you'd all like to hear about the potential candidates meeting with the Wizard of Oz.
  .. First, President Bush went to see the Wizard and said, "Everyone says I have no compassion or feelings, I wish to have a Heart"....
• POLITICALLY INCORRECT DEFINITIONS OF WHAT BILL CLINTON'S REALLY SAYING What he says.
  ...........................What he means ----------------------------------------------------------------------- "My fellow citizens"....
• It's Good Friday and Jesus is getting crucified on top of the hill.
  Down at the bottom are Peter, Mary, and the rest of his gang....
• US President Bill Clinton plans to reduce the budget deficit by an appeal to sacrifice.
  The problem, however, is that every time he gets near a virgin....
• How many Reaganists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  Ten. One to deny that the bulb is burned out, one to clarify the denial "The bulb is really just dim", one to blame the bulb burning out on the Carter-Mondale administration, one to blame the bulb burning out on the Congress, one to ask for a constitutional amendment that will prohibit bulbs burning out, one to replace the bulb with a kerosene lamp, one to borrow money from the Japanese to pay for the kerosene, one former Reaganist to lobby his old colleagues for a special favor for the kerosene importer, one to cash the check for investing in the kerosene importer, one to send the bill to the next generation....
• John Anderson has endorsed Mr. Mondale. Apparently his new National Unity Party couldn't find any of its own members willing to lose.
• How about that footage on the news yesterday of our new Commander-in- Chief on the deck of the aircraft carrier (Teddy Roosevelt?
  ).. After throwing one of his snappy salutes (he's *almost* got that down), I half expected him to give the order, "Let's turn this thang around....
• Mr. Mondale says he'd raise taxes if elected and says Mr.
  Reagan will too. If he's going to base this campaign on truth and candor he's got even less chance than we thought....