Related:

• How long do you suppose it will be before the Miss America pageant asks Bob Guccione to be a judge?
• Other Ways to Liven Up the Miss America Pageant 10.
  Each contestant must spend a night baby-sitting at the Kennedys' 9....
• From davidbe@sco.UUCP Wed Feb 15 18:30:06 1989 Flag
  000000000000 From: davidbe@sco.UUCP Subject: A Song for the 80's (Offensive to Republicans) Keyword...
• GIVE YOURSELVES A HAND excerpted from "Kids Who Eat Paste" performed by The Brunching Shuttlecocks written by Lore "Cosmic Slug" Shoberg Scene
  A podium, with the Presidential Seal and a few microphones on it....
• 25 Snappy Comebacks to the age old question "Why aren't you married yet?
  1. You haven't asked yet. 2. I was hoping to do something meaningful with my life....
• Penthouse" plans to publish a new set of nude pictures of Vanessa Williams in January.
  Sounds like a double exposure....
• Comebacks To "Why Aren't You Married Yet?" ** You haven't asked yet.
  ** I was hoping to do something meaningful with my life....
• How about that footage on the news yesterday of our new Commander-in- Chief on the deck of the aircraft carrier (Teddy Roosevelt?
  ).. After throwing one of his snappy salutes (he's *almost* got that down), I half expected him to give the order, "Let's turn this thang around....
• It would have been even more interesting if the platform floor fights had been, instead, mud wrestling.
  Updated version of the annual song: "Bare she is, Miss America. . ....