Related:

• May your computer grow ears and start listening.
• Start your day out right - Hug a Texan!
• You Might Be A Redneck If... ** The Halloween pumpkin on your front porch has more teeth than your spouse.
  ** You let your twelve-year-old daughter smoke at the dinner table in front of her kids....
• I'd go through anything for you. Let's start with your bank account.
• It is possible that blondes also prefer gentlemen. Nah!
• Ladies & Gentlemen, Elvis has left the bldg.
• Ladies and Gentlemen, Elvis has left the planet.
• Start your order with "I'd like. . . ". A little later, slap yourself and say "No, I don't.
• Q: How does every ethnic joke start? A: By looking over your shoulder.