Related:

• Remember: Spell Check your jokes, and include a one line signature at most.
  From werner Wed Jul 13 14:06:34 1988 Flags: 000000000001 From...
• Draft Dodger Rag by Phil Ochs [annotated for Danforth Quayle] Oh I am just a typical American boy [with a filthy rich grandpa] > from a typical American town [where my daddy runs the newspaper] I believe in God and Senator Dodd and keeping old Castro down.
  [not to mention Daniel Ortega] And when it came my time to serve I knew better dead than red, [or is it better red than dead?...
• The Search for Signs of Intelligent Life in the Universe
  All my life I said I wanted to be someone...I can see now that I should have been more specific....
• A mortician's daughter named Maddie, Told an eager, but virginal, young laddie, "If you do as I say, We can have a great lay, Since I've buried more stiffs than my daddy.
• Ken's Letter To Santa: Dear Santa, It has come to my attention that one of my colleagues has petitioned you for changes in her contract, specifically asking for anatomical and career changes.
  In addition, it is my understanding that disparaging remarks were made about me, my sexuality, and some of my fashion choices....
• A Newfie and a Nova Scotian are working on a barn roof.
  Their only way up or down is a long ladder, which of course falls over while they are up on the roof....
• The Shape I am In... There's nothing the matter with me, I'm just as healthy as can be, I have arthritis in both knees, And when I talk, I talk with a wheeze.
  My pulse is weak, my blood is thin, But I'm awfully well for the shape I'm in....
• Woman in her 40's never had sex. She decides to go to an oriental doctor to find out what was wrong with her, since she had heard so much about their ancient herb and other knowledge.
  Doctor tells her to strip from the waist down. She goes behind the curtain and does....