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I'd Give You A Piece Of My Mind, But I Need It More.
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I'd give you a piece of my mind, but I need it more.
Related:
She (to passing man): Excuse me, do you have the time?
He: Do you have the energy? What is your favorite position on extramarital sex?...
While looking for a Real Job (read: technical writing), I've been paying the bills doing medical transcription work.
I came across a book today called "The Empty Laugh Book" by the American Association for Medical Transcription, containing some of the funniest dictated and transcribed quotes from the world of medicine that I've ever encountered....
George Washington and The Cherry Tree... George? Yes, father?
George, I have a very serious question to ask you and I want you to promise you'll answer truthfully....
After many years of marriage John was suddenly very ill.
The doctors ran test after test but could not determine what was wrong....
Lord, give me patience... and I need it NOW!
Well if you need me, I'll call you........and If I want your opinion, I'll give it to you.
.....
Since a lot of people have been passing out questionares, I thought I'd it one of my own.
1) Are you a liar? A) Yes B) No C) None of the above 2) Do you fill out questionnares correctly?...
I called up the local auto club this morning to ask for a map of Colorado.
The receptionist who answered the phone asked me to spell my last name, and then my first name....
Here is a simple, but fun, practical joke you can try.
You need a phone with a handset so that you can unscrew the mouth piece and remove the pickup....