Related:

• How many Jewish mothers in law -- does it take to change a light bulb?
  (cue typical accent, shoulders hunched...) Three. One to screw it in and two to gossip about it behind her back....
• How many Jewish mothers in law -- does it take to change a light bulb?
  (cue typical accent, shoulders hunched...) None, they'll just sit in the dark, they know you can't be bothered to do a simple thing like change a light bulb for them, and after all they've done for you....
• How many GLC workers -- does it take to change a light bulb?
  Four. One to do it and three to go round putting up posters announcing that the GLC, working for London, is going to change the light bulb....
• How many Jewish mothers in law -- does it take to change a light bulb?
  (cue typical accent, shoulders hunched...) None! I don't mind sitting here in the dark vilst u goes out enjoying yourselves....
• How many Trotskyists -- does it take to change a light bulb?
  (Cue typical sarcastic angry Alexei Sayle voice) It's no use trying to CHANGE it, it's got to be SMASHED !...
• How many conductors -- does it take to change a light bulb?
  Seven. (Indignant nose upturned.) Of course, I wouldn't expect you to understand....
• How many election canvassers -- does it take to change a light bulb?
  None. They'd just go round telling everyone that it's time for a change but the only way this can come about is if everyone votes for "New light bulb....
• How many people at a London Vegans meeting -- does it take to change a light bulb?
  All thirty. Well, actually it's only one, but he has to wait at least half an hour while the others read out all the announcements....
• How many programmers -- does it take to change a light bulb?
  One, but you can never change it back again....