Related:

• I thought he was one of the human race - but he is not.
• A horrible little boy came up to me and said, `You know in your book The Martian Chronicles?
  ' I said, `Yes?' He said, `You know where you talk about Deimos rising in the East?...
• Director: OK, listen up, everybody: this is the hardest, most expensive scene in the movie, and we only get one shot at it, so we _have_ to do it right.
  Fallout Boy will untie Radioactive Man and pull him to safety moments before he's hit with a forty-foot wall of sulfuric acid that will horribly burn everything in its path....
• Translations from the Child: "I don't know why. He just hit me.
  He hit his brother. "I didn't hit him. I just sort of pushed him....
• I hit you, you hit me, we're all bruised so ba-aaad-ly.
• My boy is mean kid. I came home the other day and saw him taping worms to the sidewalk, he sits there and watches the birds get hernias.
  Well, only last Christmas I gave him a B-B gun and he gave me a sweatshirt with a bulls-eye on the back....
• One day President Reagan, Chairman Andropov, the Pope, and a boy scout were flying together in an airplane.
  Right out in the middle of nowhere the plane developed engine trouble and started to go down....
• One day President Reagan, Chairman Brezhnev, the Pope, and a boy scout were flying together in an airplane.
  Right out in the middle of nowhere the plane developed engine trouble and started to go down....
• If I stop loving anything will it all come back one day?
  Cuz everything I love is taken away. -- Hit Me...