Related:

• Zweig: Er, Marge, this may not be the best time to bring this up, but, uh, your last check bounced.
  Marge: Wait, I'm remembering something. Zweig: Yes, Marge, there's still the matter of -- Marge...
• I have a funny daddy Who goes in and out with me And everything that baby does Daddy's sure to see, And everything that baby says, My daddy's sure to tell.
  You _m_u_s_t have read my daddy's verse. I hope he fries in Hell. -- Ogden Nash...
• I have a funny daddy Who goes in and out with me And everything that baby does Daddy's sure to see, And everything that baby says, My daddy's sure to tell.
  You must have read my daddy's verse. I hope he fries in Hell. -- Odgen Nash (1902-1971)...
• Lawyer: Krusty, have you _ever_ seen this so-called animation genius before?
  Krusty: Yes I have. Lawyer: [surprised] You have?...
• If it would have been a snake, it would have bitten me.
• Wiggum: If it isn't my old friends from Springfield, the Simpsons!
  What brings you folks to New Orleans? Ba...
• Wiggum: Son, you wait here while Daddy tries to talk some sense into this raving derelict.
  [the man raves as Wiggum walks up] Wiggum...
• Yo momma so slutty that I could've been your daddy, but the guy in line behind me had the correct change.
  Yo momma so slutty she had her own "Hands across her ass" charity drive....
• If there was a terrible storm outside, but somehow this dog lived through the storm, and he showed up at your door when the storm was finally over, I think a good name for him would be Carl.
  -- Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey...