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• In bed the other night my girlfriend asked "if you could know exactly when and where you would die, would you want to?
  I said "no". She said, "ok, then forget it". -- Steven Wrigh...
• My girlfriend does her nails with white-out. When she's asleep, I go over there and write misspelled words on them.
  -- Steven Wrigh...
• One day I got on the usual bus, and when I stepped in, I saw the most gorgeous blond Chinese girl.
  ..I sat beside her. I said, "Hi," and she said, "Hi," and then I said, "Nice day, isn't it?...
• I can remember the first time I had to go to sleep.
  Mom said, "Steven, time to go to sleep." I said, "But I don't know how....
• My baby she don't know me when I think about those years.
• My girlfriend does her nails with white-out. When she's asleep, I go over there and write misspelled words on them.
  -- Stephen Wrigh...
• By George I think she's got it!
• My friend Sally is a nudist. I went to her house. The closets have no doors.
  The walls are covered with see-through wallpaper....
• I bought a house, on a one-way dead-end road. I don't know how I got there. -- Steven Wrigh