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• I bought a portable cable tv. -- Steven Wrigh
• I went to the hardware store and bought some used paint.
  It was in the shape of a house. I also bought some batteries, but they weren't included....
• My girlfriend and I went on a picnic. I don't know how she did it, but she got poison ivy on the brain.
  When it itched, the only way she could scratch it was to think about sandpaper. -- Steven Wrigh...
• I bought an ant farm. I don't know where I'm gonna find a tractor that small. -- Steven Wrigh
• I bought some powdered water, but I don't know what to add to it. -- Steven Wrigh
• I bought a million lottery tickets. I won a dollar. -- Steven Wrigh
• I live on a one-way, dead-end street ...
• I went to the hardware store and bought some used paint.
  It was in the shape of a house. I also bought some batteries, but they weren't included....