Related:

• Democracy is being allowed to vote for the candidate you dislike least.
• Remember the good old days where you decided which candidate to vote for by asking who would do the most good?
  Now you ask who will do the least harm....
• Three fellas up in heaven. St. Peter's interviewing them.
  He says to the first guy, "How did you get up here in heaven?...
• How do you know she is a unicorn?" Molly demanded. "And why were you afraid to let her touch you?
  I saw you. You were afraid of her." "I doubt that I will feel like talking for very long," the cat replied without rancor....
• If you get somebody to give you a dollar, they'll vote for you for the rest of their lives.
  -- Hugh Parmer, Democratic candidate for the 1990 U.S. Senate, from Texa...
• A lawyer shows up at the pearly gates. St. Peter says, "Normally we don't let you people in here but you're in luck, we have a special this week.
  You go to hell for the length of time you were alive, then you get to come back up here for eternity....
• Marge's sign: An Independent Voter for Bailey Lisa's T-shi
  I wish I were old enough to vote for Bailey. Bart's T-shi...
• I vote that you add it to the disclaimers in the report.
• What they said: What they meant: "I recommend this candidate with no qualifications whatsoever.
  (Yes, that about sums it up.) "The amount of mathematics she knows will surprise you....