Related:

• AFRICAN, n. A nigger that votes our way. -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary
• RED-SKIN, n. A North American Indian, whose skin is not red -- at least not on the outside.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• RIBROASTER, n. Censorious language by oneself concerning another.
  The word is of classical refinement, and is even said to have been used in a fable by Georgius Coadjutor, one of the most fastidious writers of the fifteenth century -- commonly, indeed, regarded as the founder of the Fastidiotic School....
• EJECTION, n. An approved remedy for the disease of garrulity.
  It is also much used in cases of extreme poverty. -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• NOBLEMAN, n. Nature's provision for wealthy American minds ambitious to incur social distinction and suffer high life.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• PHILISTINE, n. One whose mind is the creature of its environment, following the fashion in thought, feeling and sentiment.
  He is sometimes learned, frequently prosperous, commonly clean and always solemn....
• MAJESTY, n. The state and title of a king. Regarded with a just contempt by the Most Eminent Grand Maste
  Grand Chancellors, Great Incohonees and Imperial Potentates of the ancient and honorable orders of republican America....
• Hand, n.: A singular instrument worn at the end of a human arm and commonly thrust into somebody's pocket.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• FOREFINGER, n. The finger commonly used in pointing out two malefactors.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...