Related:

• Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness, feel the slippery finish.
  Caresses it, experience it. Quite smooth, isn't it?...
• Homer: Ehh, someone had to take the babysitter home.
  Then I noticed she was sitting on the gummi Venus, so I grabbed it off her....
• I just broke up with someone, and the last thing she said to me wa
  "You'll never find anybody like me again." And I'm thinking...
• Lisa: I like you too, Milhouse, but not in that way.
  You're like a big sister. Milhouse: No, I'm not!...
• Duncan [Phoebe's Husband]: Oh God, I don't know how to tell you this.
  I'm straight. Phoebe: Huuh. Duncan: Yeah, I know, I....
• He tricked me into marrying him. He told me I was pregnant. -- Carol Leife
• It's slim pickings out there. When you're first single, you're so optimistic.
  At the beginning, you're like: I want to meet a guy who's really smart, really sweet, really good-looking, has a really great career ....
• Yar: "Captain Jean-Luc Picard, I wish I could say you've been like a father to me, but I've never had one so I don't know what it feels like.
  But if there was one person in this universe who I would choose to be like, someone who I would want to make proud of me, it's you....
• Are you a parent? Do you sometimes find yourself unsure as to what to say in those awkward situations?
  Worry no more... Do as I say, not as I do. Do me a favour and don't tell me about it....