Related:

• Ooh I was ugly, so ugly that when I was born the Doctor told my mother "I did all I could but he pulled through anyway".
• When I was growing up my mother kept telling me we're just friends.
  I tell ya I was an ugly kid. I was so ugly that my Dad kept the kid's picture that came with the wallet he bought....
• Yeah, but my mother-in-law is MEANER than YOURS.
• I think we've got an eater! Are you suggesting.. eating my mother?
  ?? Uhhh - yeah! Not raw, cooked! -- Monty Pytho...
• No beer, wine, or liquor will ever touch my lips...I use a straw.
• All that I am my mother made me. -- John Quincy Adam
• My mother traded with a Ferengi for me when I was a baby.
• My Mom always told me that sex was a dirty, ugly, horrible thing that I was only to do with someone I loved.
• Mischa: [to Monica] And the vet said it was time. And so from half a world away, while my Mother held the phone to his ear, I said good bye to my dog.
  In seven languages. Monica: Oh. [to Phoebe] Can I have a tissue?...