Related:

• His great aim was to escape from civilization, and, as soon as he had money, he went to Southern California.
• Did you hear about the man who never worried about his marriage until he moved from New York to California and discovered that he still had the same milkman.
• By the middle 1880's, practically all the roads except those in the South, were of the present standard gauge.
  The southern roads were still five feet between rails....
• When I drink, *everybody* drinks!" a man shouted to the assembled bar patrons.
  A loud general cheer went up. After downing his whiskey, he hopped onto a barstool and shouted "When I take another drink, *everybody* takes another drink!...
• Jesus died too soon. If he had lived to my age he would have repudiated his doctrine.
  -- Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche (1844-1900)...
• The world's most avid baseball fan (an Aggie) had arrived at the stadium for the first game of the World Series only to realize he had left his ticket at home.
  Not wanting to miss any of the first inning, he went to the ticket booth and got in a long line for another seat....
• Regarding President Reagan, "For 7 1/2 years I've worked alongside him, and I'm proud to be his partner.
  We've had triumphs, we've made mistakes, we've had sex....
• If a man runs after money - that man is money-crazy.
  If a man keeps the money he earns - he is a capitalist....