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• Razors pain you; Rivers are damp; Acids stain you; And drugs cause cramp.
  Guns aren't lawful; Nooses give; Gas smells awful; You might as well live. -- Dorothy Parke...
• Razors pain you; Rivers are damp; Acids stain you; And drugs cause cramp.
  Guns aren't lawful; Nooses give; Gas smells awful...
• Razors pain you, Rivers are damp, Acids stain you, And drugs give you cramp.
  Guns aren't lawful, Nooses give, Gas smells awful, You might as well live....
• You are in a very damp room. There is no water here, but the air smells smells of it.
  There are exits in most directions....
• I can give you a sentence with the word horticulture.
  You can lead a horticulture but you can't make her think. -- Dorothy Parke...
• You can lead a whore to culture, but you can't make her think. -- Dorothy Parke
• Dorothy: But how can you talk without a brain? Scarecrow
  Well, I don't know... but some people without brains do an awful lot of talking....
• The man she had was kind and clean And well enough for every day, But oh, dear friends, you should have seen The one that got away.
  -- Dorothy Parker, "The Fisherwoma...
• How could you tell?
  -- Dorothy Parker (1893-1967), on being told -- of the death of President Coolidge...