Related:

• Dear Lord: I just want *one* one-armed manager so I never have to hear On the other hand, again.
• Lord, please let me find a one-armed economist so we won't always hear "On the other hand.
  .." -- Edgar R. Fiedle...
• Dear Advertisers, I am disgusted with the way old people are depicted on television.
  We are not all vibrant, fun-loving sex maniacs. Many of us are bitter, resentful individuals who remember the good old days when entertainment was bland and inoffensive....
• Everthing is farther away than it used to be. It is even twice as far to the corner and they have added a hill.
  I have given up running for the bus; it leaves earlier than it used to....
• Marge: But on the other hand, when you don't take advantage of an opportunity, you can end up regretting it for the rest of your life.
  Homer: You're right, Marge. Just like the time I could have met Mr....
• Marge: Homey, I -- Homer: Can't talk, praying. Dear Lord, the gods have been good to me and I am thankful.
  For the first time in my life, everything is absolutely perfect just the way it is....
• Sarah:[ Oh, I must be mad. I'm sick of being cold and wet and hypnotized left, right, and center.
  I'm sick of being shot at, savaged by bug-eyed monsters, never knowing if I'm coming or going, or even being!...