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• One day I got on the usual bus, and when I stepped in, I saw the most gorgeous blond Chinese girl.
  ..I sat beside her. I said, "Hi," and she said, "Hi," and then I said, "Nice day, isn't it?...
• If researchers wrote nursery rhymes... Little Miss Muffet sat on her gluteal region, Eating components of soured milk.
  On at least one occasion, along came an arachnid and sat down beside her, Or at least in her vicinity, And caused her to feel an overwhelming, but not paralyzing, fear, Which motivated the patient to leave the area rather quickly....
• The honeymooning couple agreed it was a fine day for horseback riding.
  After a mile or so, the bride's mount cantered under a low tree and a branch scraped her forehead lightly....
• She was ugly! She was known as a two-bagger. That's a girl who's so ugly, when you go out with her you put a bag over your head in case the bag over her head breaks.
  She was so ugly, you look in the dictionary under "ugly" and you see her picture....
• Yo momma so ugly just after she was born, her mother said "What a treasure!
  and her father said "Yes, let's go bury it....
• Yo momma so poor when I saw her kicking a can down the street, I asked her what she was doing, she said "Moving.
• A pretty young lady named Vogel Once sat herself down on a molehill.
  A curious mole Nosed into her hole -- Ms. Vogel's ok, but the mole's ill....
• Once upon a time there was a beautiful young girl taking a stroll through the woods.
  All at once she saw an extremely ugly bull frog seated on a log and to her amazement the frog spoke to her....