Related:

• Being summoned by the Athenians out of Sicily to plead for his life, Alcibiades absconded, saying that that criminal was a fool who studied a defence when he might fly for it.
  -- Plutarch (46-120 AD) -- Alcibiade...
• Trees hit cars only in self-defence.
• Did you all know that there is five constipated men in the bible?
  1) Caine, he wasn't able 2) Moses, he took the tablets 3) Solomon, he sat for fourty days 4) Samson, he brought the house down 5) Baalam, he couldn't move his ass....
• The foreman of a lumber camp put a new workman on the circular saw.
  As he turned away, he heard the man say, "Ouch!". "What happened?...
• What wise words from the world's greatest defence council?
  ...(reads) ...'Dear Mother'...unusual start... -- Edmund : Corporal Punishme...
• There was a man who enjoyed playing golf, and could occasionallly put up with taking in a round with his wife.
  One time (with his wife along) he was having an extremely bad round....
• Beifeld's Principle: The probability of a young man meeting a desirable and receptive young female increases by pyramidal progression when he is already in the company of
  (1) a date, (2) his wife, (3) a better looking and richer male friend....
• Beifeld's Principle: The probability of a young man meeting with a desirable and receptive young female increases by pyramidal progression when he is already in the company of
  (1) a date, (2) his wife, (3) a better looking and richer male friend....
• Beifeld's Principle The probability of a young man meeting a desirable and receptive young female increases by pyramidal progression when he is already in the company of (1) a date
  (2) his wife, and (3) a better looking and richer male friend....