Related:

• There once was a plumber from Leigh, Who was plumbing his maid by the sea, Said she, "Please stop plumbing, I think someone's coming!
  Said he, "Yes I know love, it's me....
• Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness, feel the slippery finish.
  Caresses it, experience it. Quite smooth, isn't it?...
• You hear what she said Mordock? She said I was cute.
  "Is that good, Wesley?" Yes...I think. -- Wesley and Mordock about Oliana, "Coming of Age", stardate 41416....
• Abou Ben Adhem (may his tribe increase!) Awoke one night from a deep dream of peace
  And saw, within the moonlight in his room, Making it rich, and like a lily in bloom, An angel writing in a book of gold....
• In the Plaza Hotel once, when I was doing the quiz show, there was a priest in the elevator.
  I hope you're not offended by this--I'd tell a story about a rabbi but it doesn't fit, and neither did the rabbi and they finally threw him out of the synagogue....
• A horrible little boy came up to me and said, `You know in your book The Martian Chronicles?
  ' I said, `Yes?' He said, `You know where you talk about Deimos rising in the East?...
• Casey came home from seeing the doctor looking very worried.
  His wife said, "What's the problem?" He said, "The doctor told me I have to take a pill every day for the rest of my life....
• The more they over-think the plumbing the easier it is to stop up the drain.
• Holly: I was in love once -- a Sinclair ZX-81. People said, No, Holly, she's not for you.
  She was cheap, she was stupid and she wouldn't load -- well, not for me, anyway....