Related:

• Bart: Lisa, will you keep it down? I'm making a crank phone call to Principal Skinner.
  Skinner: [on phone] Well, as a matter of fact, my refrigerator _wasn't_ running....
• Skinner: Children, the times they are a-becoming quite different.
  Test scores are at an all-time low, so I've come up with these academic alerts....
• Skinner: Now I have learned that most of the orchestra is having their appendixes removed
  o without further ado, I give you the remnants of the Springfield Elementary School Orchestra...
• Skinner: Ooh, now we're into the dregs. Here's Ralph Wiggum's entry.
  [pulls sheet off] Pre-packaged "Star Wars" characters, still in their display box?...
• Lisa: My name is Lisa Simpson and I made a chart of all the suspects in the Burns case.
  Look! [holds up a card] Mr. Burns hurt all these people financially....
• Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness, feel the slippery finish.
  Caresses it, experience it. Quite smooth, isn't it?...
• Lewis: [covered in leaves] Hey, look at me. I'm Skinner's body!
  Bart: That is not funny, Lewis. Milhouse: Well, I heard Skinner's buried under his parking spot....
• Ralph: [whispers] Hey, Alison: what's the answer to number nine?
  Alison: [whispers] I can't tell you, Ralph. Lisa...
• Skinner: [gasps] A principal's ransom in stolen goods!
  Well, sir, who's "Ha-ha"-ing now? Nelso...