Related:

• Brad: Principal Skinner, let's try some rage work. I want you to pretend this dummy right here is your mother.
  Skinner: OK, I'll try. Brad: Tell this dummy mother exactly how you feel right now....
• Troy: [laughing] That's too funny! I can't remember when I've heard a funnier anecdote.
  [laughing] All right, now you tell one. Selma: Well, not much happens to me....
• Ned: OK, folks, look: I called the police captain in Shelbyville.
  He says he hasn't seen our kids, but if they show up in the morgue, he'll fax us....
• Bart: [on walkie talkie] Milhouse! What's seven in roman numerals?
  Milhouse: I'll tell you, Bart, but you really should end each transmission with the word "over"....
• Monica: Please tell me you_re stopping now. Pete: I_m fine!
  I'd fight tonight, if they_d let me. [stands up and starts swinging his arms] See this circle I'm marking off here?...
• Selma: You know, smoke actually smells good when it's coming out of you.
  .. Oh, I'm all out. Troy: Here, try one of my cigars....
• Homer: Welcome to the Simpson residence or "casa de Simpson," as I call it.
  Grimes: Yeah, what did you want to see me about, Simpson?...
• Thank you, Martha Quinn. [Audience applauds] There you have i
  unrehearsed testimonies from important celebrities....
• Oh, hi! I'm Troy McClure. You might remember me from such self-help videos as "Smoke Yourself Thin" and "Get Confident, Stupid".
  Well, now I'm here to tell you about the only real path to mental health....