Related:

• Woman: Why would you want to work at a Kwik-E-Mart?
  Woods: To be honest, in my upcoming movie I'm going to be playing this tightly-wound convenience store clerk and, I kind of like to research my roles and really get into it....
• Apu: Ah, my old Squishee machine. And my scum bucket with fly!
  And a whole check list. Woods: Hey, you're Apu Nahasapeemapetilon, aren't you?...
• Inspector: Name? Woods: James Woods, heh. Woma
  Previous job experience? Woods: Ooh, uh, let's see, "True Believer", uh, "Salvador", "Onion Field", uh -- "The Hard Way"?...
• Woods: 75, 85, 90, and a dollar. Thank you, and come again.
  Hey, wait a minute! Hey! Uh...could I just ask you a question?...
• Woods: Apu! Apu: Oh, the searing kiss of hot lead.
  How I've missed you! I mean -- I think I'm dying. -- "Homer and Apu...
• Apu: He is the benevolent and enlightened president and C.
  E.O. of Kwik-E-Mart -- and in Ohio, Stop-O-Mart....
• Tony, you're my agent. You _have_ to do something about this.
  ...How can it be the same movie if they've changed my character from a convenience store clerk to a jittery eskimo firefighter?...
• Apu: You see, whether igloo hut, or lean-to, or a geodesic dome, There's no structure I have been to, which I'd rather call my home.
  When I first arrived, you were all such jerks, But now I've come to looooooove your quirks....
• Marge: [checks the fridge] Oh, we're low on milk for Maggie.
  You want to come with me to the Kwik-E-Mart?...