Related:

• Marge: You will not be getting a tattoo for Christmas.
  Homer: Yeah. If you want one, you'll have to pay for it out of your own allowance....
• Marge: [in bed, reading the shopping list] I get the feeling there's something you haven't told me Homer.
  Homer: Huh? Oh, I love you Marge. Marge: Mm, Homer, you tell me that all the time....
• Oh, Bart, that's so sweet. It's the best present a mother could get, and it makes you look so dangerous.
  -- Marge in Bart's dream of getting a tattoo, "Simpsons Roasting on an Open Fire...
• Bart: One `mother' please. Clerk: Wait a minute. How old are you?
  Bart: 21, sir. Clerk: Get in the chair....
• Bart: Hey, Santa, what's shaking? Homer: What's your name, Bart .
  .. ner? -- er, little partner? Bart: I'm Bart Simpson....
• Marge: [writing] The magic of the season has touched us all.
  Homer: Marge, haven't you finished that stupid letter yet?...
• Maggie is walking by herself. Lisa got straight A's.
  And Bart... Well, we love Bart....
• Pr.Sk: I caught your son defacing school property this morning.
  We estimate the damage is $75, and frankly, we think it's terribly unfair that other taxpayers should foot the bill....
• Bart: Hey Santa, what's shakin', man? Homer: [as Santa] What's your name, Bart.
  ..ner? Uh, little partner? Bart: I'm Bart Simpson, who the hell are you?...