Related:

• Well, you're in for a whale of a show tonight. Uh, I'd like to point out that the doors are now locked, so you parents can't sneak out of the show after your own child as performed.
  Oh, and let me caution the people in the first five row...
• Edna: OK, it's book report time. We'll do them alphabetically.
  Today it's A through M. Bart: I'm saved!...
• a scream is heard from the room above] Skinner: Bart Simpson!
  I know it's you! -- Principal Skinner fills in for Miss Hoover, "Lisa's Substitute...
• Lisa: My name is Lisa Simpson and I made a chart of all the suspects in the Burns case.
  Look! [holds up a card] Mr. Burns hurt all these people financially....
• Marge: [hearing radio] Mmm...this sounds awfully controversial.
  Lisa, you _know_ I don't like controversy in this house....
• Homer: [kindly] And what does my little girl want? Lisa
  An absence of mood swings and some stability in my life....
• Girls: Keepaway! Keepaway. Lisa: Hey, come on! Those are prescription shoes.
  I _need_ them. Girls: [chanting] You have cooties!...
• Skinner: All right, first academic alert: Wiggum, Ralph.
  Ralph: I won, I won! [walks on stage] Skinner: No no, Ralph, this means you're failing English....
• Lisa: Aah! It's the beating of that hideous heart!
  [everyone looks at her] I mean, I think I hear something....