Related:

• The President is not in his office at this time. Please leave your name, phone number, the name of the country you wish to invade, and the secret password.
• At the sound of the tone, you will be charged $10 for the first minute and $
  2 for each additional minute. Please leave your name, phone number and a message....
• Hi, you have reached .... Please leave your name, phone number and a message and if we like it we will return your call".
• Very fast:) Hi, this is 904-4344. If you want to leave a message, please wait for the tone.
  If you want to leave your name and number, please press pound, press 3, then dial your name, then press 6 and dial your number....
• Please leave youre name, phone #, time you called, and favorite color of underware.
  we'll get back to you if we like the color....
• Thank you for calling Soviet Embassy. No KG... E
  o diplomats are able to answer phone, so at sound of capitalist tone, leave name, telephone number, and short description of secrets you wish to sell....
• My wife and I can't come to the phone right now, but if you'll leave your name and number we'll get back to you as soon as we're finished.
• ahhhhhhhhh...hhhhhhhhhhhhh (heavy breathing sounds, like an obcene phone call) Oh, shit, you called me!
  Sorry, leave your name and number at the beep....
• Theme from "Indiana Jones" in the background.] You've reached the residence of John and Tom.
  We can't come to the phone right now, because we're cleaning the refrigerator....