Related:

• THE BIG PIG Received the following communication from Poor Innocent Guy Asa of Montgomery, Alabama
  These should come in handy at work or when frequenting a doctor's office...
• In a similar vein, tell your victim that you have a test of coordination you would like him to try with you.
  Find a door with a fairly large crack between the door and the wall when the door is open....
• Q: How do you get an elephant into a telephone booth? A: Open the door.
• Don't open the darkroom door, you let out the dark.
• Computer Haikus Your file is that big? It might be very useful.
  But now it is gone. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Chaos reigns within....
• Did you know that on the bottom of newfie coke bottles it says "Open other end"!
• Things to do When Bored -Wax the ceiling -Rearrange political campaign signs -Sharpen your teeth -Play Houdini with one of your siblings -Braid your dog's hair -Clean and polish your belly button -Water your dog.
  ..see if he grows -Wash a tree -Knight yourself -Name your child Edsel -Scare Stephen King -Give your cat a mohawk -Purr -Mow your carpet -Play Pat Boone records backwards -Vacuum your lawn -Whine -Rake your carpet -Re-elect Richard Nixon -Critique "Three's Company" -Listen to a painting -Play with matches -Buff your cat -Race ferrets -Paint your house....
• At one of the dorms here (Techwood) I remember when lots of practical jokes were played on people.
  Of course there was the 'penny in the door frame' to 'penny' them in (keep the door from opening)....
• YOU KNOW YOU'RE DRINKING TOO MUCH COFFEE WHEN -- Juan Valdez named his donkey after you.
  -- You ski uphill. -- You get a speeding ticket even when you're parked....