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• Cheer Up... Here's Your Horrorscope AQUARIUS: January 20 - February 18 You have an inventive mind and are inclined to be progressive.
  You lie a great deal. On the other hand, you are inclined to be careless and impractical, which causes you to make the same mistake over and over again....
• The ark lands after The Flood. Noah lets all the animals out.
  Says, "Go and multiply." Several months pass. Noah decides to check up on the animals....
• GEMINI (May 21 - June 20) You are a quick and intelligent thinker.
  People like you because you are bisexual. However, you are inclined to expect too much for too little....
• Shit! Shit is a powerful word. Just think of all the concepts and ideas you can communicate with it.
  Shit may just be the most powerful word in the English language....
• AQUARIUS (Jan 20 - Feb 18) You have an inventive mind and are inclined to be progressive.
  You lie a great deal. On the other hand, you are inclined to be careless and impractical, causing you to make the same mistakes over and over again....
• How to make us Women happy... What do you think ladies?
  Is this about right? In the world of romance, one single rule applie...
• A political activist named Dave was just arriving in Hell, and was told he had a choice to make.
  He could go to Capitalist Hell or to Communist Hell....
• Old age = you + 20 years.
• ARIES (Mar 21 - Apr 19) You are the pioneer type and hold most people in contempt.
  You are quick tempered, impatient, and scornful of advice. You are not very nice....