10. "CBS: The network that brought you 'Weezie' Jefferson!"
9. "The Urkel has landed!"
8. "Watch CBS, and an angel will come to your house and touch you"
7. "Your grandparents watch us -- why don't you?"
6. "On our network there's no chance you'll see Dennis Franz
naked"
5. "Now broadcasting in color!"
4. "Watch us or we'll send Walker, Texas Ranger over to kick
your a**"
3. "We're the most entertaining network when viewed drunk"
2. "Welcome home -- to more of the same old crap"
1. "We're the poor man's WB"
(C) 1997 Worldwide Pants, Incorporated. All Rights Reserved
