Related:

• THE STATE OF THE UNION ADDRESS....THAT PRESIDENT CLINTON SHOULD HAVE GIVEN "Members of Congress.
  ..People of America....I banged her. I banged her like a cheap gong....
• Fresh Every 2.7 Days PEE YU PLATTER Clothes Pins Extra HOO FLUNG POO Napkins & Raincoats Provided SUC SUM TIT Children's Special YUNG POON TANG No Take Out Orders Accepted LUNCHEON SPECIALS SUM YUNG CHICK.
  .........$6.99 Different and Delicious WON HUNG LO....
• How to make us Women happy... What do you think ladies?
  Is this about right? In the world of romance, one single rule applie...
• GETTING RID OF TELEMARKETERS... ** If they want to loan you money, tell them you just filed for bankruptcy and you could sure use some money.
  ** If they start out with, "How are you today?" say, "I'm so glad you asked, because no one these days seems to care, and I have all these problem...
• Are you waiting for your prey?
• Things to do When Bored -Wax the ceiling -Rearrange political campaign signs -Sharpen your teeth -Play Houdini with one of your siblings -Braid your dog's hair -Clean and polish your belly button -Water your dog.
  ..see if he grows -Wash a tree -Knight yourself -Name your child Edsel -Scare Stephen King -Give your cat a mohawk -Purr -Mow your carpet -Play Pat Boone records backwards -Vacuum your lawn -Whine -Rake your carpet -Re-elect Richard Nixon -Critique "Three's Company" -Listen to a painting -Play with matches -Buff your cat -Race ferrets -Paint your house....
• You Know You're A Horse Person When... - You are totally grossed out by human hair in the sink or tub, but don't mind horse hair in your washer, on your clothes, in your food.
  .. - You know you're a horse AND dog person when you don't mind throwing frozen manure balls for the barn's goldie to fetch!...
• I think I have one of these books. It is by George Heyduke (Hayduke?
  ). When I read it, I was practically overcome with mirth....
• Social Engagements You stay by her side the entire party 0 You stay by her side for a while
  hen leave to chat with a college drinking buddy -2 Named Tiffany -4 Tiffany is a dancer -6 Tiffany has implants -8 When mingling, you hold your mate's hand and gaze at her lovingly +1 When mingling, you introduce her as "the old ball and chain" and pat her on the rump -5 When she points out a hot-looking woman and asks if you think she's pretty, you say, "Yes, but nowhere near as pretty as you" +1 When she points to a woman and asks if you think she's pretty, you say, "Yeah, but don't worry, she's lousy in bed" -6 That woman is her sister -90 You have one drink, and that's it 0 You have more than a few and perform the tango with a poodle....