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• NATIONAL CONDOM WEEK Cover your stump before you hump.
  Before you attack her, wrap your wacker. Don't be silly, protect your Willie....
• Two polack junkies, shooting up heroin in a back alley, kept passing the same needle to each other.
  After awhile, one polack said, "Hey, what we're doing is a high risk activity for aids!...
• Friend of mine walking was supposed to meet a friend in a seedy joint.
  Went in, and there were a bunch of guys (including my friend's friend) shooting up and passing around the needle....
• An Italian and his two Polish friends drank at the same bar every night after work.
  One evening, the Italian keels over and dies. Well, the cops come and are filling out the report and one of them asks the Polacks, "Did your friend have any distinguishing marks?...
• The ark lands after The Flood. Noah lets all the animals out.
  Says, "Go and multiply." Several months pass. Noah decides to check up on the animals....
• Jerk! Now get this. I was sitting at my desk, when I remembered a phone call I had to make.
  I found the number and dialed it. A man answered nicely saying, "Hello?...
• What's the difference between a banjo and a(n)... Chain Saw
  ( 1.) a chain saw has a dynamic range. ( 2.) you can turn a chain saw off....
• EEKING OUT A LIVING IN RADIOACTIVE SHOES Come now, don’t any of you baby boomers remember having your childhood feet x-rayed at the shoe store?
  It was right about the time we were being stuffed with megadoses of penicillin no matter what the wheezy etiology, and ducking for cover under one-armed elementary school desks in mock nuclear bomb attacks....
• When I was in a six person suite of rooms, one of my room mates was a witch, and by coincidence, another room mate had a key to his room.
  One night the witch room mate returned to find that all six calendars in his room were set to October, and there was a pentagram of pencils on his desk....