What Women Drink...
Seven New York City bartenders were asked if they could nail a women's
personality based on what she drinks. Though interviewed separately, they
concurred on almost all counts.
THE RESULTS:
Drink: Beer
Personality: casual, low maintenance, down to earth
Your approach: challenge her to a game of pool
Drink: Blender Drinks
Personality: flakey, annoying, a pain in the ass
Your approach: avoid her, unless you want to be her cabin boy
Drink: White Zinfandel
Personality: easy, thinks she is classy and sophisticated, actually has no
clue
Your approach: make her feel smater than she is.....
Drink: Wine
Personality: conservative and classy, sophisticated
Your approach: tell her you wish Reagan had had four more
years...Alzheimer's and term limits be damned.
Drink: Mixed Drinks
Personality: older, has picky taste, know what she wants
Your approach: You don't have to approach her. She'll send YOU a drink
Drink: Shots
Personality: hanging with frat-boy pals or looking to get drunk and naked
Your approach: easiest hit in the joint. Nothing to do but wait.
PROGRAMMING LANGUAGES ARE LIKE WOMEN
by: Daniel J. Salomon Department of Computer Science, University of Waterloo
Waterloo, Ontario, Canada N2L 3G1
There are so many programming languages available that it can be very
difficult to get to know them all well enough to pick the right one for you....
Social Engagements
You stay by her side the entire party 0
You stay by her side for a while hen leave to chat
with a college drinking buddy -2
Named Tiffany -4
Tiffany is a dancer -6
Tiffany has implants -8
When mingling, you hold your mate's hand and gaze at her lovingly +1
When mingling, you introduce her as "the old ball and chain"
and pat her on the rump -5
When she points out a hot-looking woman and asks if you think
she's pretty, you say, "Yes, but nowhere near as pretty as you" +1
When she points to a woman and asks if you think she's pretty, you say,
"Yeah, but don't worry, she's lousy in bed" -6
That woman is her sister -90
You have one drink, and that's it 0
You have more than a few and perform the tango with a poodle....