Virus Alert...
If you receive an email entitled "Badtimes," delete it immediately. Do not
open it. Apparently this one is pretty nasty. It will not only erase
everything on your hard drive, but it will also delete anything on disks
within 20 feet of your computer. It demagnetizes the stripes on all of your
credit cards. It reprograms Your ATM access code; it screws up the tracking
on your VCR and uses subspace field harmonics to scratch any CD's you
attempt to play. It will re-calibrate your refrigerator's coolness settings
so all your ice cream melts and your milk curdle. It will program your phone
auto dial to call only your mother-in-law's number. This virus will mix
bubble bath into your fish tank. It will drink all your beer. It will leave
dirty socks on the coffee table when you are expecting company. It will
replace your shampoo with Nair and your Nair with Rogaine, all while dating
your current boy/girlfriend behind your back and billing their hotel
rendezvous to your Visa card. It will cause you to run with scissors and
throw things in a way that's only fun until someone loses an eye. It will
rewrite your backup files, changing all your active verbs passive tense and
incorporating undetectable misspellings which grossly change the
interpretations of key sentences. If the "Badtimes" message is opened in a
Windows 95/98 environment, it will leave the toilet seat up and leave your
hair dryer plugged in dangerously close to a full bathtub. It will not only
remove the forbidden tags from your mattresses and pillows, but it will also
refill your skim milk with whole milk.
WARN AS MANY PEOPLE AS YOU CAN (or just laugh at the joke and get on with
your day...)
BE A KID AGAIN....
Give yourself a gold star for everything you do today.
Dot all your "i"'s with smiley faces
Sing into your hairbrush
Grow a milk mustache
Smile back at the man in the moon
Read the funnies Throw the rest of the paper away
Dunk your cookies
Ask somebody if their refrigerator is running
Play a game where you make up the rules as you go along
Order with eyes that are bigger than your stomach
Open a pack of cupcakes and give one to a friend even
though you wanted both of them for yourself
Pretend your bread rolls are tap dancing
Step carefully over sidewalk cracks
Change into some play clothes
Try to get someone to trade you a better sandwich
Have a staring contest with your cat
Eat ice cream for breakfast
Kiss a frog just in case
Give someone a "Hug-around-the-neck"
Blow the wrapper off a straw
Refuse to eat crusts
Make a face the next time somebody tells you "no"
Watch TV in your pajamas
Ask "Why?...