Related:

• Some Really Dumb Criminals (Washington DC) Two men tried to pull the front off a cash machine by running a chain from the machine to the bumper of their pickup truck.
  Instead of pulling the front panel off the machine, though, they pulled the bumper off their truck....
• The Poles have a saying about how communist governments rewrite history
  "Only the future is certain; the past is always changing" A would-be bandit failed because he had written a holdup up note on another bank's withdrawal slip....
• A man was very shy, and couldn't speak to more than two people at a time without getting nervous.
  His boss and wife both suggested that he take an Andrew Carnegie course....
• The Importance of Advance Planning The husband of a woman I used to work with held up a Domino's that was located directly across the street from the police station.
  When he left the store, the employee from Domino's went outside and said to the policeman standing across the street that he had just been robbed....
• What's the difference between a banjo and a(n)... Chain Saw
  ( 1.) a chain saw has a dynamic range. ( 2.) you can turn a chain saw off....
• How to Mess up a Job Interview Personnel executives of 100 major corporations were asked for stories of unusual behavior by job applicants.
  1. "... stretched out on the floor to fill out the job application....
• The Importance of Not Being Greedy A man went into a convenience store in Melbourne, Florida, to rob it.
  He decided that just taking the money wasn't good enough...
• Punny 1. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, but when they lit a fire in the craft it sank-proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it, too.
  2. Two boll weevils grew up in South Carolina. One went to Hollywood and became a famous actor....
• My favorite stupid bank robbery story happened here in Rochester, NY a few years ago.
  Man walks into the bank with a mask, pulls out a gun, and demands that the teller give him all the money....