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Why do they bury lawyers 20 feet deep after they die?
Because deep, deep, deep down, they are really nice people....
If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why should you never swerve to hit him? It might be your bicycle.
Santa Claus, the tooth fairy, an honest lawyer and an old drunk are walking down the street together when they simultaneously spot a hundred dollar bill.
Who gets it? The old drunk, of course; the oth...
How do you know if a lawyer is cold? He has his hands in his own pockets.
Good News: A busload of lawyers ran off a cliff. The bus was destroyed and there were no survivors.
Bad News: There were three empty seats....
How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Three. One to climb the ladder, one to shake the ladder and the other one to sue the ladder company....
What do you get when you cross a lawyer with a demon from hell? Another lawye
Why did God make snakes just before lawyers? To practice.
What's the difference between a female lawyer and a pit bull? Lipstick.
What's the difference between a lawyer and a cold-blooded snake with a guilty conscience?
The conscience....
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