Three slightly deaf Englishmen were driving along in a car when they
came to a small town. "I say, is this Wembly?", said one. "Naw,
it's Thursday", said the second. "So am I. Let's stop and 'ave
one", said the third.
Q. What is the definition of rape?
A. Assault with a lively weapon.
Q. What is rape by a 90 year old man?
A. Assault with a dead weapon.
"Say have you seen my new dog?"
"Spitz?"
"No, but he drools a little."
