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• There was a young fellow named Simon Who tried to discover a hymen, But he found every girl Had relinquished her pearl In exchange for a solitaire diamond!
• There was a young fellow named Lancelot, Who his neighbors all looked on askance alot Whenever he'd pass A presentable lass, The front of his pants would advance a lot.
• 172 There was a young girl named Heather Whose twitcher was made out of leather.
  She made a queer noise, Which attracted the boys, By flapping the edges together....
• There was a young fellow named Tupper Who took a young lady to supper.
  At a quarter to nine They sat down to dine, And at twenty to ten it was up her....
• Asquemish young fellow named Brand Thought caressing his penis was grand, But he viewed with distaste The gelatinous paste That it left in the palm of his hand.
• 37 There was a young fellow named Fyfe Whose marriage was ruined for life, For he had an aversion To every perversion And only liked fucking his wife.
• 17 There was a young fellow named Charteris Put his hand where his young lady's garter is.
  Said she, "I don't mind, And higher up you'll find The place where my fucker and farter is....
• 97 There was a young fellow named Skinner Who took a young lady to dinner At a quarter to nine They sat down to dine
  At twenty to ten it was in her. The dinner, not Skinner -- Skinner was in her before dinner....
• There was a young girl named Sapphire Who succumbed to her lover's desire.
  She said, "It's a sin, But now that it's in, Could you shove it a few inches higher?...