Related:

• Q. Why did the moron throw the butter out the window?
  A. Because he wanted to see a butterfly. Q. Why did the little moron throw margarine out of the window?...
• Two Ukrainians went hunting. One accidentally shot the other.
  The shootee rushed the shot to the hospital and watched while they wheeled his friend into the O....
• My dental hygienist is cute. Every time I visit, I eat a whole package of Oreo cookies while waiting in the lobby.
  Sometimes she has to cancel the rest of the afternoon's appointments....
• A woman from the south was attending a social gathering up north and tried striking up a conversation .
  .. "Where're you all from?" she asked to a group of ladies....
• The ark lands after The Flood. Noah lets all the animals out.
  Says, "Go and multiply." Several months pass. Noah decides to check up on the animals....
• THE DARWIN AWARDS Date: December,1997 The Darwin Award is made each year to the person who has managed to kill themselves (and therefore prevent the survival of their genes - hence Darwin!
  ) in the most bizarre way imaginable. Previous winners have included the man killed when the vending machine he was trying to extract a can of Coke from fell on him, and last years aviator who strapped a JATO module (rocket) to his car and lit the blue touchpaper....
• Well, there was this guy who'd been living a really great life as an art dealer in New York City, making tons of money and everything.
  He was 30 and fixed for life, a millionaire, when he went to the doctor and found out that he had a very rare bone disease that was sure to kill him before he reached 31....
• The Poles have a saying about how communist governments rewrite history
  "Only the future is certain; the past is always changing" A would-be bandit failed because he had written a holdup up note on another bank's withdrawal slip....
• MY DOG "Sex") Usually, everyone who has a dog either calls it 'Rover' or 'Fifi' or some- thing.
  I called mine 'Sex.' Well, 'Sex' is a very embarrassing name....