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• Roach racing: America's favorite pasttime.
• Mommy, mommy, I don't like drag racing!" "Shut up and hang on to the bumper ...
• A doctor was taking a group of interns on rounds at a hospital.
  All of a sudden, another intern came racing down the corridor, shouting "Quick, doc- tor, give me a pen!...
• The young male race horse came from a long line of winners, and did wonderfully in time trials.
  However, in actual races he proved a little too romantic, and could never quite bring himself to pass a mare....
• BEST EXCUSE NOT TO GET CHARGED WITH SPEEDING A man was driving home late one afternoon, and he was driving above the speed limit.
  He notices a police car with its red lights on in his rear view mirror....
• Great Excuse A man was driving home late one afternoon, and he was driving above the speed limit.
  He notices a police car with its red lights on in his rear view mirror....
• A priest wanted to raise money for the church. He was told that there was a fortune in horse rasing, so he decided to purchase a horse and enter it in a race.
  However, at an auction, the going price for a horse was so steep that he decided to buy a donkey and race it....
• A priest, who wanted to raise money for his church, was told there was a fortune in horse racing, and so he decided to buy a horse and enter it in some races.
  However, at the local auction, the going price for horses was so steep that he decided to buy a donkey instead....
• What do women and airplanes have in common? They both have cockpits!
  Two plastic surgeons are talking about their recent operations, and one mentions that he grafted tits onto a sailor's back sometime ago....