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I am not responsible for advice not taken!
I am waiting for my winning Lotto ticke
I am tolerant of your (fruitcake) belief
I avoid cliches like the plague.
I am not young enough to know everything.
I am so smart I make myself sick.
I call things as I see them; If I didn't, I make them up!
I bought some batteries, but they weren't included
I bought an internal modem, but I can't swallow it.
I backed up my hard drive... and smashed into a bus!
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