Related:

• Like the man who threw a stone at a bitch, but hit his step-mother, on which he exclaimed, "Not so bad!
  -- Plutarch (46-120 AD) -- On the Tranquillity of the Mind...
• Be sure you're right, then go ahead. CROCKETT
• There was a young lady named Bright, Whose speed was far faster than light.
  She went out one day, In a relative way, And returned the previous night! -- Reginald Bulle...
• A couple of young fellers were fishing at their special pond off the beaten track when out of the bushes jumped the Game Warden.
  Immediately, one of the boys threw his rod down and started running through the woods like the proverbial bat out of hell, and hot on his heels ran the Game Warden....
• Nobert Weiner was the subject of many dotty professor stories.
  Weiner was, in fact, very absent minded. The following story is told about him...
• Be sure you are right, then go ahead. -- The motto of David Crockett in the war of 1812
• During a fight, a husband threw a bowl of Jello at his wife.
  She had him arrested for carrying a congealed weapon....
• My wife's on a diet. She used to be so fat every time she got into a taxi the driver rushed her to the hospital.
  She went to the health club and one week she lost fifteen pounds....
• Did you hear about the meanest man in the world didn't tell his wife he was sterile until she got pregnant.