Related:

• They don't call me Colonel Homer because I'm some dumb-ass army guy.
  -- Homer Simpson Colonel Home...
• Goodman: OK, let's see if we've learned anything. I want you two to simulate a typical household problem.
  Go. Cletus: [on Homer's knee] Uh, Pa, I cut my finger on the screen door again....
• Lurleen, I can't get your song outta my mind. I haven't felt this way since `Funky Town.
  ' -- Homer Simpson Colonel Home...
• Homer: [snores] Bart: Look alive, Simpson, I'm not paying you to goldbrick.
  Homer: [wakes up] Uh... Yes sir. Bart: Now get cracking on my long division, and don't forget to show your work, Simpson....
• SMILEY { :-) Marge Simpson (Homer's wife)
• I'm livin' it, but I ain't lovin' it.
  -- Bart suffers through Homer and Marge's story, "The Way We Wa...
• It takes two to lie. One to lie and one to listen. -- Homer Simpson Colonel Home
• Well let's call them, uh, Mr. X and Mrs. Y. So anyway, Mr.
  X would say, `Marge, if this doesn't get your motor running, my name isn't Homer J....
• Patty: Hmm...am I wrong, or did it just get fatter in here?
  Homer: Request permission to slink by. Patty: Permission pending....