Related:

• Barney: [bell rings] Oh no, we're late for wood shop!
  Homer: But... we're early for lunch! Let's go grab a burger....
• Homer: Oh, I've got 15 minutes to gain a pound or I have to face another day at work!
  Bart: Bad news, Dad. We're out of food. We're even out of the basic elements of food....
• Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness, feel the slippery finish.
  Caresses it, experience it. Quite smooth, isn't it?...
• Homer: [standing on one foot and singing "The Alphabet Song"] W, X, Y, and Z.
  Now I know my ABCs, won't you come and play with me....
• Bart: If you gain 61 pounds they'll let you work at home?
  Homer: Y'uh huh, that's the deal. No more exercise program, no more traffic, no more blood drives or charity walks....
• Ned: Thank you so much, Homer. You're a true friend.
  Homer: Right back at you, buddy. Now how about that game at the Pitch'N'Putt?...
• Barney: Hey, Estelle? Will you go to the prom with me?
  Estelle: I wouldn't go to the prom with you if you were Elliot Gould!...
• Marge: I can't believe you bought that plow. We can't afford it!
  Homer: If you're going to get mad at me every time I do something stupid, then I guess I'll just have to stop doing stupid things!...
• Ned: Well, I guess now we know why they call them "rapids" and not "slowpids", huh?
  Bart: [appreciative] Ha, ha! Homer: You are not my son!...