-- How many
Polish-Americans
-- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
170. One to send the Never Fail Novena to the Cheektowaga Times
for publication so St. Jude may grant the light bulb request,
one to say the Last Rites for the old light bulb, ten volunteer
firemen to break into the house and smash the old light bulb to
bits, fifty to protest the abortion of the old light bulb, ten
to organize a lawn fete and spaghetti dinner at Our Most Holy
Precious Blood of the Seventeen Martyred Saints R.C. Church to
raise funds to buy a new light bulb (and the Monsignor a new
pair of bowling shoes as a gift on St. Stanislaus Day), twenty
from Chiavettas Catering to serve the food, twenty to run the
Monte Carlo gambling tent, fifty to run everything else, one to
go to Koplinskis Appliances to buy the light bulb, one to screw
it in, five to say the Rosary as the bulb is being screwed in,
and the Monsignor to bless it.
